Dreams, dreams, of when we had just started things.
Dreams, of me and you.
And it seems, it seems, that I can't shake those memories.
I wonder if you feel the same way too?

The littlest things that take me there
I know it's sounds lame but it's so true
I know it's not right but it seems unfair,
the things are reminding me of you.

Sometimes I wish we could just pretend,
even if only for one weekend.
So c'mon, tell me, is this the end?

-

Last night, jan and paul came to look for me to see if I was doing okay.
And I know, many friends sent smses to check if I'm okay, but I didn't reply to them.
I just want you all to know, I'll be okay.
And I am really glad to have you all to care for me, and worry for me.
But don't worry, I'll get on with life.

Last night, it took so long before I finally fell asleep.
And when I did, I dreamt of you. I dreamt of just your face, and nothing else.
Then, I woke up.

I ended the night not feeling so sore, but relieved, rather. That we'll always remain as special friends.
Yet, when the dream broke through, I realised that we're no longer together, and that now, I'll refer you as my friend, my ex boyfriend. It tore me apart.

But I didn't cry.

I told you, I won't cry again. Because crying will only make me want you back more. And crying is a painful process.

This morning, I woke up, feeling the heart stabbing pain again, and still, I didn't cry.

But I still can't make it to work today.

I realised, I miss the mornings where I woke up, finding an early morning message from you.
And the nights where I would fall asleep to your voice.

They all seem so faraway now.

I must not lose to the tears. I must not lose to the tears. I must not lose to the tears.










But, I lost.